The Phantom Planet-1961

Directed by William Marshall. With Dean Fredericks, Coleen Gray, Anthony Dexter. Wow! The DVD box sure is exciting if not deceiving. Full color brutal alien action. The movie itself is in black and white and absent of an alien for the first half of the movie. When the alien does appear it reminds me of a Freakie from Freakies Cereal. Our adventure starts with a pair of stylish space patrollers at the mercy of a wobbly asteroid on a collision course with their ship, wait that's no asteroid it is a planet. They are destroyed. A second ship is launched from Earth's moon base and is captained with our hero Commander Chapman and his guy pal. After a bout with the flying tin foil nuggets, the poor expendable sidekick is launched into outer space while invoking the Lord's prayer. Commander Chapman is then forced to land on the Phantom Planet (asteroid) only to find the gravity being what it is has shrunken him down to the size of a Ken doll inside his suit . Lucky for him there are inhabitants. The Rehtons. There is a King, his small subjects and hot chicks that make Chapman part of they're scene after a jury (of hotties) decides he is to be free, but only as a Rehtonite forever. This is done to protect their secrets of gravity. A lot of gibberish and confusing theories later we find that a jealous Rehtonite who loves the King's daughter whom the daughter naturally has fallen in love with the blond battleship Chapman, wants to kick Chapman's ass in a duel. Well Chapman actually is in love with a hot mute über brunette. The duel ensues in a battle to the death and Chapman who gains the upper hand doesn't crush the jilted local because he is more of a lover than a killer, so... The duelists strike up a truce to get Chapman off the planet by figuring out how to enlarge him and shoot him off into space. At this point is when the aliens figure in. The aliens, named Solorites, are at war with the nomadic planet and attack. The Rehtons have captured one of the Solarites, but of course escapes and jumps on the mute who screams alerting Chapman to come to her rescue. Chapman is able to knock the alien on a disintegration pad thus freeing the mute of her silence. She declares her love and wishes for him to stay. My theory is is that she probably should have kept her mouth shut. For the good of the Rehton's secret civilization Chapman decides to leave in the most ridiculous of ways. He is enlarged perfectly back into his suit and rescued by another ship of lovers who fly the groggy Chapman (why he's groggy I am not sure) back to the moon base. Will he keep his pie hole shut or will he spill it convincing his pals into believing him? The corn ball hits the fan at the end as the Narrator says "This is not the end,...but the beginning!" Wha? beginning? I would have to say that there probably were a lot of script changes happening during the filming of this and at times it becomes a bit tedious to pay attention to. I had to ultimately watch it at work, because the more comfortable I was the more I tended to fall asleep. All in all it is definitely one star quality. Not a must see but funny enough to rip on from beginning to end.